Boris Johnson's ten-point guide to bashing Labour

my response

Boris Johnson has written a 10-point guide to bashing Labour in the Daily Mail. Let's review these points one by one.

Starmer's majority is built on sand - it's a mile wide and an inch deep

This is correct. The Tories lost the election rather than Starmer winning it. He got 9.7 million votes, which is less than Corbyn, who got 12.9 million in 2017 and 10.3 million in 2019. Starmer isn't particularly popular, and only won because the Tories are even more unpopular and the right wing vote was split between them and Reform.

(1) Immigration: Starmer is foolishly going to scrap the Rwanda plan, the only scheme yet devised to beat the cross-Channel gangs. Pound him on this.

Starmer probably realises that reducing legal and (even more so) illegal immigration will be a vote winner, and not doing so may well be a massive vote loser. The problem is his activists won't like it.

(2) Housing: Labour governments always build fewer homes than Tory governments – because they don’t like private property and prefer social housing. Hammer away at this, and give young people the hope of a home, and the most important single reason for voting Tory.

If Starmer has any sense he will build lots of both types of housing. Where planning regulations prevent this, he must scrap them.

(3) Brexit: Starmer is going to try to sneak back into the EU, and turn this country into a satrapy of Brussels. He will try to make this country subject to EU rules, but with no say in making those rules – an anti-democratic abomination. Go critical on this from the outset.

To the extent that a country wants to export its goods to the EU, it has to obey the EU's rules. Of course, before Brexit we did have a say in making them. But now we are forced to be a rule-taker.

Because Russia is attacking Ukraine, now is not the time for European disunity. Instead we must be as united as possible, to oppose Putin better.

(4) Levelling up: Starmer now claims this campaign – but it was our idea, and our plan. It’s the right thing for the country, and Labour needs to be held remorselessly to account over everything from high-speed rail (where we should revert to our 2019 policy) to reversing Labour’s shameful anti-nuclear policy.

The problem is the Tories scrapped HS2 past Birmingham. And "levelling up" was always just a slogan, whose purpose was to disguise that the Tories only care about the rich.

Labour need to do something about infrastructure spending in north England -- either HS2 or tram / light rail systems.

(5) Crime: Starmer believes in cutting prison sentences and he sides with Sadiq Khan in opposing stop and search. He’s soft. We’re tough – and we back the police. We must say so.

The Tories slashed funding for the police, courts and prisons, and had to let prisoners out early because there weren't enough prison places for them.

(6) Net zero: It’s the right idea – provided we use it to promote UK green technology, and millions of UK private-sector jobs. Starmer just seems interested in state control and regulation. Our approach is better.

Yes, green technology should mean lots of UK-based jobs, e.g. building wind turbines.

(7) Tax and growth: Starmer is obviously about to put taxes up, when they are already at very high levels, and when the state does not always spend our money well. Starmer and his Chancellor Rachel Reeves think they can just get away with these unnecessary tax hikes. Don’t let them. They also want to impose all sorts of crazy new employment rules, such as ethnic pay gap reporting and a ban on contacting colleagues after hours - furthering hindering UK productivity. Oppose this stuff ferociously.

If someone is paid for 40 hours a week, they shouldn't be obliged to be contactable when they're not at work, because the employer hasn't paid for that time. Before mobile phones were a thing, employers managed perfectly well not being able to contact their employees, so this should not be a problem.

If employers want to mandate what an employee can do when not at work, they should pay them at least the equivalent of the minimum wage for all 168 hours in the week.

(8) Public services: Starmer is viscerally opposed to extra private money going into our services. He seems to hate both private education and private healthcare. His position is grossly illiberal and economically nonsensical. He is also likely to cave in to unreasonable union-driven pay demands. Say no.

It is cheaper for the NHS to do healthcare rather than contract it out to private contractors who will charge more.

(9) Wokery: Starmer wants more mandatory wokery. It is important to be sensitive to people’s feelings, but some of this stuff is bonkers and needs to be opposed.

As with immigration, Starmer is potentially vulnerable here.

There are two aspects of wokism he might be vulnerable on: Firstly, racial discrimination against white people, which he should forbid.

Secondly, trans issues. In particular, people with penises convicted of rape who identify as trans women should not serve their sentences in women's prisons. Nor should trans women be allowed to compete against women in sporting tournaments as they have an unfair advantage.

(10) Global Britain: There is a real danger that traditional pro-Moscow sentiment in the Labour Party will lead to a softening of the UK position on Ukraine. That would be a tragedy.

Yes it would. It would also be a tragedy if the Tories cozied up with Farage, who is a Putin-loving traitor. If I was Starmer I'd get MI5 to look into Farage with a view to prosecuting him for treason. Unfortunately we no longer have the death penalty for that crime.

Last thought – when we get back in, don’t be too hasty to get rid of successful election-winning leaders. As I never tire of telling people, some polls put us only two or three points behind, in the days before I was forced to resign in what was really a media-driven hoo-ha. As for Reform, it was regularly polling zero. Only pointing it out...

Ha ha ha ha ha. If you want the Tory leader job, Boris, you'll have to get elected to parliament first!